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    June 23

    顾影自怜

              睁开眼睛发现四周黑暗。睡的昏天黑地,头痛。出去拿杯水喝,看见镜子里憔悴的脸。努力想了想应该做些什么,还是打开电脑。显示器亮的时候,眼睛刺痛。
        
              朋友说我过分的自私的宠爱自己。我想这是与生具来的。身边没人的时候总想希望有个人说话。很多时候都只能是自己扮演这样的角色。不断地重复,轻声,温柔地。那样的顾影自怜。
        
             找不到一点点力气,亦是那种生活需要的激情。走在阳光下感觉皮肤一寸一寸地炸开。让人不安。于是选择白天睡觉。然经常失眠。只能喝冰的矿泉水,不停抽烟。
                
             手中拿着最后一支烟。把玩着,一直看着。燃烧再被遗弃让人感到卑微。于是狠命地吸。咳嗽。烟头很烫也不愿放开。
       
             是傻还是懂珍惜?
        

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